after a few weeks of this new start
though she could see he was trying
she could also see that it wasn't working
she loved him and everything
but she couldn't keep living through this
like this for ever
& so one night when he was fucked up
she slipped the gun
into his open mouth
blew his head all over the wall
behind the bed
where they had made their babies
she sat there afterwards for a while
cried a little
made some cocoa
read a Stephen King novel
until she fell asleep next to him
in the night she cuddled him
in his dark uncomplicated wetness
.
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