I only believe in the god
that gives wild snowstorms
a man awoke in the far east
he left his house early
and jumped into a river from a high bridge
he swam around a little
in his best clothes
then went home all wet
snuck into bed
his wife turned over and reached for him
ugh she said
you're all wet
yeah baby he said
I have come from the sky
for three days they made love
without interruption
until eventually she wanted cake
I want cake, she said
I can make cake, he said
out of my eyes
watch this
she watched for a while just in case
they are invisible and wild cakes, he said
okay, she said
then this is an invisible and wild fuck
and it's all you will ever get
until you bring me cake
he went out early that morning seeking cake
but no one in that land had cake
he sailed on ships purporting to be headed
for the lands of cake
but no cake found he
only a tiny morsel
which he kept about him
at last he came home
and found his wife with the baker from next door
my wife, he cried, how and why?
oh fuck off she said, didn't want
that lousy eastern cake anyway
and you are insane and a control freak
and my Relate counsellor says get the fuck outta there
all night by the river he squatted
chewing upon his morsel and pondering
at dawn he arose with fury
and burst into the house
he threw the baker into the river
and turned then upon his wife
evil woman, he cried
I have sought cake in many lands
all the while you have baked yourself
in the arms of bakers and strangers
give me she says
that last piece
and all will be well
he hands it over
the sun comes up
everyone leaves houses and goes to work
the trees drop conkers
all is well
he sits watching reality TV
sucking on his last crumb
living at last really living
the wild life
.