Jesus bouncing

2003 hotel in Glasgow
back after the night out down at the bar
on whatever street
Jesus is wasted naked pissing all over the floor
in his hotel room
left the door open the fat night guy
comes around looks in
oh god he says oh god oh god
in that worthy Scottish
Jesus turns around says oh fuck sorry
Jesus has a reasonable body, not great
but you know, pretty trim
not muscular really but maybe some wiry stuff
and he is naked and pissing
and the Scottish night guy is saying oh god oh god
eventually Jesus gets bored with this and starts to scream
wah he screams
wah
this goes on for a while
the Scottish guy panics
runs back to the reception
gets the ancient Claymore off the wall
comes running back down the corridor
Wah, screams creeping Jesus, Wah!
mad Scottish fucker takes his whole head off with one swing
the head of the living god bouncing down the wet corridor
down the stairs
out the door
run over by a late night taxi
phut
almost an explosion—plop bang kinda
driver almost stopped
wondered anyway
what it coulda been

yeah only Jesus bouncing

again

drive on, drive on
the lights are bright
tonight
and the river sure does tinkle
in this mist

.